Shattered Promises
by Shayla17
Summary: Reid makes a deal with Hotch about his drug problem. But when it all becomes too much, he lies to get out of it. Hotch isn't pleased.  WARNING: CONTAINS NON-SEXUAL SPANKING OF ADULT. If you don't like this PLEASE do not bother to read or review.
1. Chapter 1

**Title**: Shattered Promises

**Summary**: Hotch confronts Reid about his drug problem, and strikes up a deal with him. Things seem to be getting better until Reid decides to go back on the deal and lie about it. Hotch will do anything to keep the youngest member of his team on the straight and narrow... even if it means dealing with him in a parental fashion.

**WARNING**: This story DOES contain the non-sexual spanking of an adult. If you don't like this, please don't bother reading or reviewing.

**A/N**: I'm big on fics that center around Reid and Hotch, so I thought I would try my hand at one. This story takes place somewhere between seasons two and three, dealing with Reid's drug habit. I'm trying to get it as accurate as possible, but I'm not perfect. Hope you guys like it! (Also thanks supergirl, again, for your words of advice, I really appreciate it)

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Criminal Minds or any of the show's characters.

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><p>Addiction. Spencer Reid could tell you a lot of things about addiction. He could recite to you the definition of the word, could recall whole studies he'd read on the subject. He could even give you a full psychological profile of a person struggling with any particular addiction. But he could not, for the life of him, look his boss in the eye and talk about it as it pertained to him.<p>

"H-Hotch," he stammered, avoiding eye contact with the older man at all costs. "Do we really have to do this...?"

He had been ready to go home, to fall into bed and sleep for several hours, when his boss had stopped him and confronted him about something he wished he could just put behind him.

"Yes," Aaron "Hotch" Hotchner replied firmly. "Part of my job as this team's leader is to make sure problems with my subordinates get solved..and I've ignored this one long enough. However..."

"So I'm just a problem for you to fix then?" Reid interrupted, slightly hurt by the older man's words.

"Let me finish," Hotch said gently. "However you are more to me than just a person under my charge. Spencer... you're family to all of us. And you know that. Which is why this needs to be dealt with. I do not want someone in my family hurting, and I will not allow someone in my family to make choices that could hurt their health or their career. Do you understand?"

Reid nodded slowly, relaxing a bit. Though he'd rather have been doing anything other than having this conversation, it was still nice to be cared for.

"What are you going to do?" He asked quietly before quickly adding, "I've been doing better since New Orleans, I promise I have..."

"I believe you," Hotch said, wanting to reassure the younger man. "But this is just the beginning, Reid... and I don't think you can do this on your own. So what I'm going to do is make you a deal."

"A deal...?"

"That's right. I'm going out on a limb here, Reid... I should report you. Drug abuse is absolutely unacceptable behavior. However, I'm not going to report you provided that you hold up your end of the bargain."

"Which would be..?" Reid inquired, starting to feel nervous.

"There's a Narcotics Anonymous group that I'd like you to join. I want you at a meeting twice a week as long as we're not away for a case. In addition I'm going to be subjecting you to random drug testing. I don't care whether you think that's fair or not, it's what's going to happen. Lastly, I need you to promise to call me if you're having a craving. I don't care what time of day it is. I don't care if we're on a case. If you have an urge, you pick up a phone and call me immediately. Are these conditions understood?"

Swallowing hard, Reid nodded. Meetings..? Tests...? This definitely wasn't going to be easy... but if it would keep his position on the team safe, he'd agree to anything.

"Alright then," Hotch squeezed his shoulder gently. "You can go ahead and go then."

Reid nodded once more and started to leave before turning back.

"Um, Hotch...?" He asked timidly. "What happens if I... don't do these things?"

"Let's hope we won't have to worry about that." Was the only reply he got before Hotch headed back to his office. Swallowing uneasily, Reid headed back for the elevators.

_Yeah_, He thought. _Let's hope._

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><p>Reid put down the worn first edition in his hand, no longer able to concentrate on reading, and rubbed his eyes with shaking hands. Everything hurt. From his body, to his mind, to his heart. It had been two weeks since he'd made his "deal" with Hotch, and it had been a hellish two weeks for the young genius.<p>

The NA meetings were harder than he could've imagined. He couldn't believe how many emotions his him at one time, couldn't believe how many people out there were suffering with such horrible addictions. It was hard for him to take.

If that weren't bad enough, Hotch's random drug tests were torture. Every time Hotch would take him aside at work or knock on his apartment door in the evening to subject him to them, he felt overwhelmingly ashamed of himself. The fact that his boss felt it necessary to take such extreme measures...well it just didn't feel good.

Reid sat back in his chair, feeling tears gathering in his eyes. The worst part of it all was that he still wanted it. Wanted it so badly it frightened him. And though he'd promised Hotch he'd call if he had a craving... it just felt too awkward for him. He'd sent him a text message once about how he was feeling, and Hotch had insisted on calling and talking to him. That had been a week before, and that had been the last time he'd said anything.

Reid blinked away his tears and looked at the clock. It was almost 6:30... almost time for his NA meeting. He wanted to weep at the thought, wanted so badly to skip the meeting, consequences be damned. And well... why not? Surely Hotch wouldn't be too angry with his missing just one meeting...

With a new resolve, Reid stood up and strode to his bedroom, purposefully changing into his pajamas and getting into bed. An early night would be good for him.

That was when his phone rang.

"Hello..." He answered quietly, knowing who it was without even having to look at the caller ID.

"It's me," Hotch replied. "Are you on your way to your meeting?"

If he hadn't been about to lie to him, Reid would've snapped at the older man for feeling the need to check up on him. But since he was, he answered politely.

"Uh, yes sir, about to leave the house now," He lied smoothly, guilt settling in his stomach.

"Good. I'll talk to you tomorrow, Spencer... I'm proud of you."

"Thanks..." Reid said quietly, swallowing hard. "Bye."

Hanging up, and laying down in bed, Reid couldn't help but feel a little nauseated. He'd just blatantly lied to his superior, as well as gone back on the deal the two had made. Whatever was going to happen now was entirely his doing.

Well skipping the meeting and going to bed was better than shooting up... wasn't it?

With a sigh, Reid rolled onto his side and closed his eyes. Whatever was going to happen, he could wait until tomorrow to worry about it.

Half an hour later, on the other side of town, Hotch shook his head in disappointment. He was sitting inside the NA meeting, hoping he'd look up and see Reid walk in at any moment, but knowing that wasn't going to happen. He thought he was going to surprise Reid, show him that he was there for him by attending a meeting with him.

But after thirty minutes it was apparent the young genius wasn't going to show... which meant he had lied to him.

Getting up as quietly as possible, Hotch left the building and headed home. Morning was going to come soon. And morning wasn't going to be pleasant for either of them.

**_TBC..._**

**A/N: Alright, so I'm not sure if I'm happy with this or not... next part will most likely be longer and better. Thank you for reading! :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Well here is the second and final part! Thanks so much for all the great reviews, I hope this doesn't disappoint or sound too rushed. Thanks for reading. :)**

Reid was officially miserable. He'd gone to bed early with the hopes of alleviating the deep tiredness in his body, but had only created more. He'd probably gotten a total of two hours sleep. The rest of the night was spent rolling over in his bed, checking the clock, and feeling nauseated.

Now he sat at his desk, sipping coffee, and trying to work on reports. It was hard to concentrate though, with the guilt eating a hole in his stomach and his leg bouncing nervously up and down. He nearly jumped out of his seat when he felt a hand touch his shoulder.

"Reid?" Morgan asked, his tone full of concern. "Are you okay, kid?"

"Y-yeah, I'm fine..."

Morgan gave him a look, obviously not believing him.

"Spencer, if something's bothering you, you know that you can always talk to me."

Reid felt tears gathering in his eyes, and looked away from the man who he knew considered him family just as much as Hotch did. All of these people cared about him so much and he'd let them down. Reid shook his head and tried to swallow the lump in his throat.

"I'm okay, Derek..." He said quietly, a resolve forming inside of him. "Um... when is Hotch getting in?"

"Any minute now," Morgan answered, a bit confused by the question. "In fact, I'm surprised he's not here already."

Reid nodded his understanding and turned back to his work. Morgan, still concerned about the kid, gave his shoulder a squeeze, and headed back to his own desk.

With shaking hands that he was started to get used to, Reid wiped at his eyes and tried his hardest to concentrate on his work.

"Good morning everyone." Reid flinched at the sound of Hotch's voice as he entered the bullpen. "If anyone needs me, I'll be in my office."

Reid waited for the sound of the door clicking shut before slowly rising from his desk and gathering the courage to do what he was about to do. Hotch deserved better than what he was giving him. And it was only fair that he do the right thing now. So with all the courage he could muster, Reid made his way up to Hotch's office and knocked.

Hotch, for his part, wasn't surprised by the knock at his door, but he was proud. Because he knew exactly who it was at his door, and he couldn't help the small smile that played across his lips when Reid walked in a second later.

"Have a seat, Reid." he instructed.

"I lied to you," he burst out, ignoring the command to sit, too eager to get the truth out and get rid of this agonizing guilt. Hotch nodded.

"I know, Spencer," He told him, his tone gentle as he knew that the kid had probably spent the night beating himself up over this.

"I'm so sorry," Reid's voice was barely above a whisper and his eyes were downcast. Tears were already making their way down his cheeks, shame written all over his features. "I didn't go to the meeting, I stayed in bed. I didn't go because... because sometimes it's just too hard to handle, Hotch! I know I should've called you, I know I should've told you the truth... but it's hard enough being this weak. I hate having to show it to everyone. I hate everyone having to know that I can't handle things."

"Slow down, Spencer," Hotch said in what he hoped was a soothing voice. "I want you to look at me, please."

It took a while for him to comply, but eventually Reid lifted his eyes to meet the older man's.

"Did you take any drugs last night."

"No!" Reid's answer was automatic and full of sorrow over the fact that his boss had to even ask this question. "No, I didn't... That's why I stayed home, I... I didn't want to. I thought going to bed would keep me from doing it..."

Hotch nodded and then let out a sigh.

"You do realize that you broke two parts of our agreement last night, Reid." The sternness that had now entered his voice had Reid looking back at the floor. "For one, you didn't go to the meeting. And for two, you didn't tell me when you were having cravings. Spencer... I didn't make this deal with you so I could run your life, or make you feel ashamed of yourself. I made this deal with you because I _care_ about you. I asked you to tell me when you were feeling a craving so that I could _help you through it._ I do not want you to go through this alone. I wish you could understand that."

Reid nodded, wiping tears from his cheek with the back of his hand. They were both silent for a moment before Reid got up the courage to ask the question that was weighing heavily on his mind.

"So, what happens now?" His voice was quiet again. "Do I... give my resignation?"

"No," Hotch answered, shaking his head. "You didn't take any drugs, and didn't do anything that needs addressing on a professional level. What you did was strictly between the two of us... so that's where this will stay."

Reid nodded once again, feeling relieved that his place on the team was still secure. At the same time he was starting to feel uneasy about how this would be handled between the two of them. He waited anxiously for his boss to continue, and after a moment of silence he did.

"We don't have a case right now, so here's what we're going to do. We're going to take an early lunch and head back to my place. The house is empty right now so we'll have sufficient privacy for your punishment."

Reid couldn't help but blush, knowing full well what Hotch was planning now. Still, he wanted to confirm it.

"You're... you're going to spank me, aren't you." It was more of a statement than a question, and Reid wasn't surprised when Hotch nodded. He wasn't a stranger to this type of punishment. In fact Gideon had taken him in hand more than once in the past and even Derek had even gone as far as given him a few warning swats before. It was something about being the baby of the team that left him wide open for all kinds of correction. But this would be a new experience.

Nevertheless, he knew that he deserved everything he got, so he nodded his understanding and headed back to his desk to nervously gather his things.

Before too long they were side by side on Hotch's living room couch.

"Whenever you're ready, Spencer," Hotch said gently, willing to be patient if it meant alleviating some of the younger man's apprehension.

"Okay," Reid nodded, and then a moment later asked another question that was weighing on him. "When I said that I lied to you and you said you knew... what did you mean by that? Am I that easy to see through?"

"I'm not sure," Hotch answered. "I didn't have to read anything into your lie last night because I saw it play out for myself. I was going to attend the meeting with you, and when you didn't show up, well... I assumed you weren't being totally honest with me."

Reid let out a shaking breath, more feelings of guilt and agony overwhelming him. Hotch had been willing to go with him and he had lied instead. Disgusted with himself Reid looked over at the older man.

"I'm ready now," He said. "Let's get it over with..."

"Whatever you're telling yourself right now," Hotch told him sternly, knowing a look of self-loathing when he saw one. "Stop it. You made a mistake, everyone does, and you're about to pay for it. There's no need to belittle or hate yourself because of a wrongdoing. Do you understand?"

"Yes sir," Reid answered with a sigh, and for a brief moment hating profilers.

Seeing nothing more that needed to be said, Hotch wordlessly took Reid over his lap, and wasted no time laying down the first stinging swat to the young man's backside. He laid down a few more in quick succession before speaking.

"I want you to tell me why you are receiving this spanking, Spencer."

"Be-becaue I broke our deal," Reid said quickly, trying to think around the heavy swats that were raining down on his backside. "M..more specifically I- Ow, Hotch! I skipped the meeting and I d-didn't tell you when I was having cravings."

"Very good," Hotch's tone was calm despite the fact that his hand was still coming down hard. "What else did you do to earn this."

"I... I lied to you. Hotch, please, I'm so sorry..."

"I know you are, Spencer." Hotch said, but didn't stop the spanking.

It wasn't long before Reid was beginning to really squirm over the older man's lap. The burning in his backside was growing by the second, and tears were streaming down his cheeks in earnest. Hotch had stopped speaking, and the only sounds in the room were his brisk swats and Reid's loud cries.

"Please, Hotch," He sobbed after a minute of this. "I promise I'll never lie to you again. I promise I'll call next time, I will!"

"That's good to hear, because if we have to have this conversation again, I promise you that you _will_ lose an article of clothing." Hotch tipped the kid forward and started to spank his sit spots in earnest, wanting this to be over just as much as Reid did. "I refuse to lose you to any addiction. I refuse to lose you because you can't come to me or to tell me the truth. I need to be able to trust you, Reid, and lying is not a good way to keep my trust."

Reid lay limp over Hotch's lap and sobbed.

"I know, I know," He cried. "I'm so sorry, so so sorry..."

Feeling like he'd gotten his point across, Hotch gave the young man one final smack and lifted him off his lap, immediately pulling him into an embrace. Reid clung to him and cried into his shoulder, trying to get a grip on himself and his myriad of emotions.

"It's okay now, Spencer," Hotch said quietly, rubbing the younger man's back in an attempt to help him calm down. "You're okay."

"Am I though?" Reid sniffed, and wiped his eyes, starting to calm. "I've allowed myself to be taken prisoner by a drug, Hotch. I have cravings for something that I know will hurt me. I'm weak..."

Hotch lifted the kid up slightly and gave him two hard swats to which he yelped.

"You are not weak." He said sternly. "Last night you may have made a few mistakes but you made one right decision that you need to remember. Despite the fact that you wanted to, you _did not _take any drugs. Resisting that urge is not an easy thing to do, Spencer, and I don't think a weak man could have done it. Do you understand?"

Reid buried his head deeper into Hotch's embrace and nodded.

"It's going to be okay, Spencer." Hotch said, starting to rub his back again. "I know that for right now it's hard, but it will get better. I promise. And even if it gets worse before it gets better, you have to understand that I'm always going to be here for you. You're my family... and I love you. Please don't forget that."

Reid blushed, but felt an overwhelming sense of happiness at the words. Being there in the arms of someone who truly cared about his well being, someone who was family and always would be, Reid realized that maybe everything could be okay after all. Maybe he wasn't weak if he had to lean on someone.

A few things he knew for sure. One, that he wasn't alone. Another that he was loved. And finally he knew for sure that he would never break another promise to Hotch again.

The End


End file.
